One may have noticed that there was no September update if one was paying close attention. The reason for that had to pertain to the heavy feeling of burnout that I’ve been experiencing, and the constant struggles to determine the direction of this blog. As I said in my brief update, I’m now sticking to a “whatever the hell I want whenever the hell I want” basis.” This means I’ll be going back to game reviews, as I just don’t have the energy to write about politics at this time. Anyway I’ve decided that I’m going to recap everything I’ve done throughout the past few months as opposed to just the last. Read more
I have spent the last few weeks thinking some things through, and have come to the conclusion that I will be taking a break from writing for the rest of the month. At the start of next month, I will determine whether or not I need more time before I resume posting. The one thing that I have determined though is that from this point on, my content will return to a “whatever the hell I want whenever the hell I want” basis. Meaning no more schedules (I will try to follow the current schedule but if I miss them, I miss them). I feel like I lost site of what this blog was supposed to be, so it’s time return to its roots.
I have previously mentioned my dilemma of not knowing what direction to take my blog in. I’ve been most recently focused on politics as of late but my game reviews were what made this blog what it was. I’ve been thinking about what direction I wanted to take things, but I think I reached a decision. I’m going to focus specifically on politics at this time, and I’m going to be doing this from now until the United States Presidential Election at least. Whether or not I keep going past that point will likely depend on whether or not Trump wins re-election.
I initially intended this blog as a long shot hope of substituting for an actual career, and maybe that could still happen. But everything is currently falling apart in my country, and if I don’t do literally everything in my power to stop it then I’m not that much better than those who actively support it. That’s not to say that there won’t be anything else, just that the focus will be on politics for a while. Anyway here is last month’s article recap. Read more
Damn, just realized I’m a bit late on the update piece. Things the past few days have been a bit crazy, which is likely why I just realized today that “oh shit, it’s already the 10th and I haven’t gotten a site update piece out! Well I better fix that. Here’s last month’s article recap. Read more
Last month was notably long and arduous, I have been struggling with my depression relapsing, and most recently, an inability to fall asleep until around 7 AM even with my usual sleep medication. My motivation to play games has been mostly shot and I’ve had difficulty getting myself to write as well. Despite this, my output seems to have been an immense improvement over the previous months. Here is last month’s recap. Read more
Something that I have been frequently telling others as of late is that the past few weeks have been all over the place, and I’ve had some amazing highs and devastating lows. As usual I plan to talk about each of these things but it feels weird nonetheless. I can at least say for certain that the intensity of the previous month means that my life is starting to get going, but thinking about where I’m going to is both exciting and nerve wracking. Anyway here is last month’s article recap. Read more
I need to confess to those who may not have caught on, but the last few months have been a major struggle for me. I have suffered from major burnout after having posted the largest piece of writing I’ve ever written and then dealt with the revelation that a close friend of mine was a manipulative sex pest so things were not going smoothly. It seemed like I was finally started to get back into the swing of things in March as I had a consistent schedule throughout that month until around the 20th where I stopped… almost permanently.
CW: Depression, suicide.
I’ve talked about my depression and suicidal ideation and I’ve made it known that they have been quite intense. It wasn’t until a few weeks ago that I attempted to act on them though. The closest I came was when my ex girlfriend cut off all contact with me and I called 911 to prevent a suicide attempt, and that happened in late April of last year. I was taken to the ER for a few hours then but this time, I was admitted to a psyche ward where I had no access to internet and thus could not talk to most of my friends or work on writing.
So there, it’s not just me being lazy this time. I was legitimately unable to do so. I should probably talk about my experience at this psyche ward but first let’s recap. Read more
Last month I have been trying pretty hard to reach the level of productivity that I’ve previously held on this site. While I definitely got a bit more stuff out than in January, it is also low compared to before that. I will chalk this up to being busier with more stuff and due to getting hit with more than a few hardships during the month of February.
Among these hardships include relapsing into my depression over my ex girlfriend because my current one hasn’t had as much time to see me in person and having my remaining two Twitter accounts suspended and thus cutting me off from a major community I was a part of for five years. I still have a Mastadon account but it’s difficult to get as passionate about that site since I’ve gotten to know many users over the past five years. This basically means I’ve spent most of my time in my Discord server retreated from public view. Read more
I would like to apologize for the lack of activity last month as I have not only been busy with “activist work” (yes I am being intentionally vague about that for a reason) but my depression has been also relapsing throughout last month. I’ve come to realize that I may have put my ambitions too high in regards to activist work. I put together a writing piece longer than some books in regards to the midterms election and maybe I just was expecting a larger view count. Don’t get me wrong, this piece is among my top 10 most viewed articles but I had my hopes up too high that it would go viral.
The issue is that I have a secret project in motion that is likely going to stay secret for a lot of people unless I let them in on it. This has resulted in me putting more time into my secret project than my writing and I have thus fallen behind in article turnout and the daily view count. As such I’m going to make an effort to better balance the two and make sure I still have a fair amount of gaming AND political content for the future. Also I have abandoned the idea of emailing every US congressperson because I already have my hands full as it is. Anyway here is the article recap of last month. Read more