Posted on by Annie Gallagher · 1 Comment

Steam Greenlight Landfill: They Breathe

They Breathe | Logo

Titles like They Breath are the types of games that Steam’s refund system was made for. It is a pointless barely interactive and directionless “experimental” title that’s only claim to decency is to be vaguely artistic in order to impress people who do not even enjoy games in the first place, or at least that’s the only way I can see games like They Breathe existing. Furthermore the game is over in about half an hour so one would be under the 3 hour limit even if they beat it 3 times.

It is not that They Breathe could not have been a good game; it is more so that They Breathe chooses not to be a good game. It does nothing other than build a light bit of suspense up at to what the point of the game could be, only to reveal that there is no point or twist at the end to begin with. That is not even taking into account that the half hour leading up to that has boring and frustrating gameplay as well.

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Posted on by Annie Gallagher

Super Smash Bros. Ultimate (Switch): Ultimately, A Letdown (Detailed Review)

Super Smash bros. Ultimate | Box art

I enjoyed Super Smash Bros. Ultimate. I enjoyed it… but I also felt it was a let down in a number of ways, and I consider it the weakest in the series (with exception to the original which I haven’t played and thus can’t speak on).

I want to emphasize that most of my criticisms of Ultimate are as a single player experience, and that I couldn’t care less that you can’t doowop an skippity uppity airslap into a wavedashed cockdump sparklenut or spitshine a ledge canceled dickknob after twirlywhirly dibdidybobbidyboo 2: Electric Boogaloo. I am aware that fighting games are typically multi-player focused, but I never got into strictly multi-player games. Also there is the fact that the Switch now requires a subscription for online multi-player that I’ve heard isn’t an improvement over Smash 4’s free online. Read more

Posted on by Annie Gallagher · 2 Comments

Standard Review: Hell Yeah! Wrath of the Dead Rabbit (PS3/360/PC)

Hell Yeah! Warth of the Dead Rabbit | Box Art

Hell Yeah! Wrath of the Dead Rabbit is a game that could be seen as somewhat of a modern twist on the whole “anthropomorphic animal with attitude” archetype that pervaded the 90s. Of course it is fitting that this was made by Sega, the same company that gave us Sonic the Hedgehog, the quintessential animal with attitude in video games. So the question is, does Hell Yeah manage to recreate what made the original Sonic memorable? The answer to that is that it kind of does, but it kind of doesn’t.

In terms of its presentation, Hell Yeah! excels. The art style is very flashy, the game has some hilarious dialogue, the music kicks ass, and pretty much everything about this game gives off the idea that this is going to be a fun game. The game’s storyline is about the prince of hell, a skeletal Rabbit named Ash, who is trying to hunt down the 100 monsters that saw a photo he mistakenly put up on his blog of him cuddling a stuffed animal. Read more

Posted on by Annie Gallagher · 4 Comments

Standard Review: Teslagrad (PC/PS3/PS4/Vita/WiiU/Switch/XONE/IOS)

Teslagrad | header

Teslagrad was an indie platformer title released in 2013 that seemed to have had some fairly decent reception. Unfortunately I really cannot why. Well technically I can but I do not find it to be a logically sound reason. Teslagrad is a game that looks nice and sounds nice, and it seems fun at first, but a lot of its design flaws are very subtle to the point where the average player won’t realize they are there. Do not get me wrong, they will in fact experience these flaws, but they will likely not see them as such despite them for some reasons that I plan to explain shortly. Read more

Posted on by Annie Gallagher · 1 Comment

Steam Greenlight Landfill: Disorder

Disorder | Logo

Disorder is a first attempt by the ridiculously named Swagabyte games that sounds interesting on the surface. It is an atmospheric puzzle platformer that uses a similar dual world mechanic as games like The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past and Metroid Prime 2: Echoes. It also has a vague allegorical storyline that is told through text appearing on screen during gameplay. While there are some decent ideas involved, the game unfortunately falls short of an interesting experience and I did not care for it. Read more

Posted on by Annie Gallagher · 2 Comments

Standard Review: eXceed 2nd – Vampire REX (PC)

eXceed 2nd Va.jpg

I first wrote my review of the first eXceed title back in 2014, and I took a lot longer to get to this game than I expected. Granted it is probably more absurd for me to have not reviewed another Senran Kagura or Persona game until now, but your Goddess works in mysterious ways after all, and by that she means that playing eXceed 2nd at this time was a spur of the moment decision without much prior thought.

It was quite convenient that I played through the first eXceed with my old crappy computer because I actually tried replaying it recently. That attempt was short lived because I realized that the first eXceed was not re-formatted for newer PCs. It was originally a 2005 title so ran well on my old crappy computer but was pretty much unplayable on my newer one. it is quite clear that the effort was put into the 2nd and 3rd games with the first one as little more than an afterthought, and having now played Vampire Rex I can see why. Read more

Posted on by Annie Gallagher · 2 Comments

Quick Review: The Deed (PC)

The Deed | Logo

The Deed seems like an interesting game at first glance. It has a unique take on the traditional murder mystery title where, instead of the detective, you play as the killer. This game has you put in the role of a man visiting his family for his father’s birthday. However, he plans to murder his sister due to his family’s refusal to have her committed, and out of revenge for her sadistic and insane behavior when he was younger. To be more specific with the storyline, Arren’s Family was abhorrently abusive to him. His father would frequently beat him and his sister killed his pet rat, and took great pleasure in doing so. What inspires Arren to commit the titular deed is when his father decides to disinherit him in favor of his sister. Read more

Posted on by Annie Gallagher · 4 Comments

Steam Greenlight Landfill: Banzai Escape

Banzai Escape | Logo

Banzai Escape is the first and only title by developer XenoAisam, and it is not hard to see why they haven’t made another one after this. Banzai Escape is of the quality where you can tell that there was genuine effort into making something good, but also can tell that it kinda sucks. I’m usually hesitant to go into full angry reviewer shtick when reviewing small indie games because I know fully well that if I ever start developing games, then my first game is probably going to be shit. This is one of the key reasons why I have been hesitant to become a game dev in the first place.

As a gamer, I WANT for devs to keep making games and to improve upon their old ones. Hurling insults at the developers and making overly long drawn out hypothetical scenarios of things I’d allegedly rather do than play their games is not going to push them to get better. It takes a lot for a game to pass that threshold and piss me off, and that rage is limited for games like Ghostie Quest, Vickinachi, Insincere, Cube Master: Light Adventure, and a dozen other games you’ve never heard of and will forget about after you are done reading this piece. Read more

Posted on by Annie Gallagher · 3 Comments

Aozora Meikyuu (PC): A Beautiful Trainwreck (Detailed Review)

Aozora Meikyuu | Title screen

Aozora Meikyuu is a short and brief ecchi visual novel by developer Yume Creations, a team name that I’m not sure exists because Dream Creations was taken by a rhinestone trimming company or if the devs were just total weebs. One can definitely get the impression that it is the latter since Yume Creation’s other games are also short ecchi visual novels with anime girls.  I want to make it clear I have nothing against anime tiddies and actually kinda liked Aozora Meikyuu, but it’s not a good game.

Aozora Meikyuu, which means “Blue Sky” in Japanese and leaves me once again unsure if the name was left in Japanese to avoid confusion with the similarly titled visual novel “Always the Same Blue Sky” that I also reviewed or if the devs are just total nerds, is something that I enjoyed in a “so bad its good” kind of way. More specifically, it is a poorly written and overall stupid mess, but it also has a unique charm that appeals to me as an otaku turned feminazi. Read more

Posted on by Annie Gallagher · 5 Comments

Penny Arcade Adventures: Episode Four (PC/360) – Through Hell and Back (Detailed Review)

Penny Arcade Adventures: Episode Four | Tree

Oh the things you never expect. When I finished playing Penny Arcade Adventures: Episode Three, I stated that I hoped that this game improved upon Episode Three the same way Episode Two improved on Episode One. While it is definitely fair to say that Episode Four was an improvement, I simply did not expect one of this magnitude. There are several things regarding this game that I did not expect.

It certainly does not do anything revolutionary nor does it look particularly innovative, but when you actually play it, you realize just how meticulously crafted this game is. Yes it may appear to be another parody of 16-bit era JRPGs, but it is so much more in terms of execution. Not only does it have the signature humor of Zeboyd’s games, but it also has a story that is actually compelling on its own merits. When you add an outstanding soundtrack by Hyperduck Soundworks, the same people behind the soundtrack of Dust: An Elysian Tale, and some of the most addicting and precise battle mechanics in any turn based RPG; you end up with a game that might as well have been made to silence anyone who said these types of games are only made to pander to nostalgia. Read more